• Bank Account, in-branch attempt.
  Nope, an appointment for an interview won’t be until next week, but you can use our online service instead.
• Bank Account, online attempt.
  Nope, you’re too much of a risk to grant an account with no credit or overdraft facility to.
• National Insurance number, first attempt.
  We need an address to post things to.
• National Insurance number, second attempt.
  Our system is down, please call back later.
• National Insurance number, third attempt.
  That address isn’t just for postage, it’s also used to refer you for an interview at a jobcentre.

Do you want people to work under the table and pay no tax?

Because that’s how you get people working under the table and paying no tax.